Einstsein's Theory of Baby Sleeping?

“We the jury find the defendant…” Those words always provide tension as the next few seconds will determine someone’s fate. I feel as if I’m in a courtroom multiple times every day and night, waiting for the verdict to come in as I try to put Adelyn down in her crib. Will I be granted some freedom or sent back to the rocking chair to try again? Over the past eighteen months, I’ve been in the exact same situation countless times and the pressure has yet to relinquish.

I always thought the expression, ‘sleep like a baby,’ meant a deep, hard to awake from sleep; but Adelyn never seems to fit that definition. She may appear to be sleeping soundly, and a blaring television doesn’t faze her, but as soon as the descent into the crib begins she becomes fully alert. It continues to amaze me, how fast the tide can turn from nearly comatose to wailing cries.

After being awoken by her cries, we go out to the recliner where I hold her. Sometimes she goes right back to sleep (Thank You God), while other times it’s a lengthy process. Either way I wait until she is in a deep sleep, usually breathing loud enough for me to hear her, and then I begin rising out of the chair. The standing up is a key moment as I have to be careful not to disturb Adelyn too much. Depending on her position and my level of alertness, it can be tricky. The room is dark and sometimes she has squirmed so much that I don’t know on what end or head is. It’s really frustrating when I have to start all over because I’ve awoken her by turning her into a human pretzel. More times than not though, the journey back towards her room goes smoothly, unless I step on one of the toys scattered across the floor. If she’s still sleeping soundly, I can feel myself laying back in bed and drifting off as soon as I close my eyes, all I have to do is just put Adelyn down.

Einstein must have been a pretty smart guy, but honestly the theory of relativity has really never served me much in life. Did he ever study how fast a sleeping, peaceful child can flip the switch to being bright eyed and furious? That would have been useful. The transformation never ceases to amaze me. It seems that the times I’m most certain that it will be a seamless transition is when the most problems occur. She can be a dead weight in my arms, but as soon as I begin to lean over the crib, Adelyn stretches out and reaches for my shirt while releasing a shrieking cry. How does she know? On the flip side, my release of her into the crib is not always perfect. I’ve never been very sure handed, and sometimes I lose my grip and kind of her drop her. Mind you it’s a very short distance and onto a soft mattress, but a little jarring, yet she settles right in. I can leave her dangling by one leg and she never wakes up, but if I ease her down gently, the waterworks are likely to start-up.

Once a successful put-down has been accomplished, I run back into bed, okay it’s more of a fast walk. Unless I’m half asleep and then it’s a slow shuffle, with which I may bump into some walls. Thankfully, I have mastered carrying Adelyn through her doorway, without hitting her head on the doorframe. (That does speed up the process) Once I’m tucked in, I wish that the whole process won’t need to be repeated again before sunrise, but it isn’t always granted.

The time will come when I miss such nights, and then maybe I can say, “The defense rests.”

 

Who needs Toys?

 

I’ve never seen it any other way, every time a young child opens gifts, they are more interested in the boxes or wrapping paper than anything else. No matter how expensive the toy, a flimsy piece of cardboard proves to be much more entertaining. However, gifts are continuously purchased as most children have more ‘stuff’ than they could ever use. Of course Adelyn is no exception, as apparently she has more toys than we have storage for, because the floor is always littered with them. Yet it seems like the majority of the time, Adelyn picks the strangest assortment of household items to play with, rather something from her collection of toys.

Based on looks alone, it’s really a pretty pitiful site, as Adelyn often walks around clinging hold to a wash cloth. A dirty, or at least used, wash cloth at that. Forget her Itty Bitty Baby, there’s a wash cloth to hold. In her defense, it is soft. I wouldn’t let her near a dry and crusty towel. It does come in handy sometimes, if there’s a spill, a runny nose, or something that needs wiped she lets me borrow it for a second.

Adelyn is also fond of water bottles. Empty or full, it makes no difference. If one isn’t sitting out somewhere, she knows where they are stored and helps herself. She can make the bottles make a variety of crinkle sounds and are perfect for pretend drinking. I did get nervous though when I saw Adelyn had learned how to spin the bottles.

Our dog, Rose, also has an assortment of toys, which Adelyn plays with more than her. At least with Adelyn the toys last longer as she doesn’t chew them up in a matter of minutes. It’s too early to tell if Adelyn is going to be athletically gifted (her chances aren’t very good), but she can at least throw a ball to play fetch. She fetches the ball herself if Rose doesn’t want to play. Even brings it back in her mouth. On more than one occasion, I’ve witnessed Adelyn step over her toys, just to pull something out of Rose’s basket. Thankfully she’s discovered there’s no meat on the bones we get for Rose, so she pushes them aside for something more useful.

People always say, ‘They grow up fast,’ but Adelyn is really rushing it. She has recently become fascinated with tampons. I’m not yet prepared to tell her how to properly use them, but she likes carrying one around. I found one she had left in her toy chest the other day. It would have been really embarrassing if a visitor had found it. I’m working on teaching her to store the extra in her purse.

If ever buying a gift for Adelyn, make it simple, and bring her a dirty sock, a set of coasters, feminine hygiene products or just an empty box. She will use those more than anything.

The Waves of Life

The first one is always the hardest…that’s why it’s taken me so long to make an entry about raising Adelyn. No, taking care of my first child hasn’t been the hard part (far from easy either), but deciding on what to write. It’s been over a year since Adelyn blessed our lives by arriving on Valentine’s Day 2017, and since then some have suggested I start a blog about my experiences of being a stay at home dad. The idea intrigued me, but I didn’t know where to start. Then I saw this picture from our beach vacation this summer and inspiration struck.

On a daily basis I’m struck by how big Adelyn is getting, not so much physically, but in what she’s able to do. She can use a fork all by herself, though it’s often barren of any food (hey, maybe that’s why she’s so small), identify body parts, and almost walk as fast as I can. It seems like only yesterday that she was dependent on us for everything, now she likes to do it all herself. No truer words were even spoken than, ‘They sure grow up fast,’ except for maybe, ‘We have the meats’ from Arby’s. ‘

Beyond its scenic beauty, for me this picture shows Adelyn stepping into, full of excitement, the big and dangerous world ahead while I’m right behind her for protection. For her the ocean, much like the world in which we live, looks like lots of fun, but it can quickly pull you down. There are both little waves to hurdle and tidal waves with the power to knock you down, all of which must be faced head-on (well, in the ocean you can turn your back, but that’s not the point!). The tide rises quickly though, and it won’t be long until Adelyn’s in deep water (literally). The older she gets the bigger the waves get. There are times I feel like I’m in a hurricane, but then I stop listening to my wife and everything is tranquil. (Just joking) Wait until Adelyn starts pre-school, and all her classmates have i-phones, so she’ll want one. The wave of being socially accepted, is a really big one, which still wipes me out sometimes.

The deeper the ocean gets, the more fish there are swimming around, biting at your heels. Those young boys can be real sharks. With all of her cuteness, Adelyn is going to be the equivalent of fishing with filet mignon as bait and really reel them in. I can see it now, at snack time a boy sits next to her and after drinking of his bottle of Fiji water says, ‘My dad is the CEO of a Fortune 500 Company, what does your dad do?’ Adelyn thinks, while pulling her sippy cup from her mouth, ‘Ummm, he watches a lot of Netflix.’ At least she’ll say it proudly.

Yes, plenty of waves are coming Adelyn’s way and it’s my wish that her excitement will never waver about diving into life (and the ocean) and that Mommy and I will always be able to pull her out when danger comes.